First off I am afraid I am breaking tradition...this is not going to be about thankfulness although I am realizing more and more how I thankful I should be for air conditioning back home. This post I think is going to be very open, God has been showing me a lot, but for a quick light note.
Today a couple of things happened, on Thursday mornings we (all four girls) get to have the morning off, to do laundry, clean and relax. Which is great for me because I can make breakfast instead of grabbing something on the go, and I have some time to read and ya-da, ya-da, ya-da. Well, this morning I had the brilliant idea to plug in my "power surge protector/extension cord" in and use it to plug in multiple objects...it exploded. It didn't explode like shot into a million pieces, but it did catch on fire, and is now in the trash can, also it was located at the time on my bed, so now my sheet has a black spot of smoke. No other objects were harmed or burned thank goodness. Somehow when I am in Africa something fire oriented happens, like when I was in Kenya I caught my skirt on fire...but that was because I wasn't thinking. Now I can laugh about both situations, here and in Kenya, although earlier this morning I was slightly shaking... :). Then during maintenance we were painting the fence and lets just say some of us may have gotten in a paint fight, except it was outside latex paint, so we had to take turpentine to our skin, I still have paint on my feet. Interesting Thanksgiving...but it was African style, very unexpected.
Over the past few days there has been a continuous theme to everything. Being the woman God has me to be. I'm reading a book, go figure, and in that it's all about as a woman living your single years for God. To be a Lady of: Faith, Virtue, Devotion, Reckless Abandonment, Purity, Security, Contentment, Conviction and Patience. I'm not saying I'm called to be single for the rest of my life, but for today I am. It's not easy when your surrounded by people that have gotten married young, getting married, talking marriage with their boyfriends, and of course Pinterest doesn't help in itself. It's a day to day surrendering, and it's my cross right now. But over these previous days, I have had realizations of letting hurt, wounds, and scars go. Getting rid of the past and honestly moving on. I had someone say to me the other day, "you've become comfortable in your hurt, it's you security blanket. Because your afraid the moment you step out your going to get hurt all over again, you can't work for God. And those dreams that you dreamed before you got hurt will happen, and you will be able to dream again like you used to." Now I had barely known this person 24 hours. What a God thing. Also, yesterday just randomly one of the woman on base told me "take your singleness as a blessing, use it, don't squander it hoping for something else", on top of that last night someone just really encouraged me in some things. I realized the other day that my "list" isn't a check list for what I want in a husband, it's a reminder of what type of woman of God that I have to be to deserve a man of such integrity,
My faith has strengthened so much because I am having to rely on the Holy Spirit for guidance and discernment in everything. For someone who had to be pushed to get out of the house, and is now in a third world country, loosing her fear. It's huge, I get scared at times yes, but it's so small to my fear back home. There is a courage God has given me, and that courage has come from literally at times of being so confused, lost and frustrated that I have to literally say "God, I can't do this, give me your wisdom and discernment". Last night I had a Haili to God pep talk...which turned into a God to Haili pep talk and Haili realizing what was wrong in her life. Interesting how that works. It starts off as me complaining to God and God turning it around and putting me in my place. Which was funny because it was in the middle of a lightening storm, I felt like Job, complaining and then God was just like "here I am, this just a little bit of how great I am". Oh how I have had to depend on Him. How many times he is just shown me a piece of who he is and what being a woman of God is all about.
So that was this week. I made my first Apple Pie in Africa. Let's see if I can do Biscuits and Gravy. And I went biking in Africa, felt like an african at that moment. I was also informed the other day by one of my students that I was changing colors. He declared "Auntie Haili, your changing colors, your arms are yellow (tanning), but your face is white." Made my day!
Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!!!! Be very thankful for the cold!! I miss the fall and winter so much, the cold and the ability to wear sweaters, jeans and boots. I actually forgot it was Thanksgiving this morning and someone said something about it and I was like it is Thanksgiving. Tonight as team we had our "Thanksgiving Dinner", pancakes. Not joking. It was pretty fun actually. And I am very excited about being able to control how much Christmas Music I want to listen to, as well as NO 104.7!! But I'll miss Hallmark and some ABC Family movies. But it's stretching me. And He is My Comforter.
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